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What I Was Really Avoiding: Jay Barbanel on Adoption, Therapy & Healing

Jay Barbanel, author of Finding Tico, unpacks what he spent two decades avoiding, and what it took to finally choose healing over silence.

More Than a Foodie
Emily Emily

More Than a Foodie

Before I came to college, being β€œadopted” was just a trait, just like how some people are born with curly hair or a crooked nose.

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Adoption, Shame & Cocktail Parties
Amy Amy

Adoption, Shame & Cocktail Parties

Cocktail parties are so interesting, full of smiles and small talk. Sort of like the perfect pictures we post on Instagram. Everyone stands around putting on their best face, dressed so nicely, chatting, pretending.

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  • Most non-adopted people oversimplify and invalidate the grief of adoptees because they assume that our families are just like other families.

    Adoptee Land by Kristen, Adoptee Contributor

  • It’s such a curious thing how being relinquished is never talked about with sorrow; but instead with applaud for the adoptive parents.

    Adoption, Shame & Cocktail Parties by Amy, Adoptee Contributor

  • I played the role of being a chameleon; not realizing the toxicity of what I was doing in allowing people to mislabel me.

    Latina Mislabeled by Martha, Adoptee Contributor

#RewritingAdoption